Post X-Pose
I will say this: Northbound does indeed know how to throw a party. Huge, sprawling, loud & dark & filled with over a thousand beautiful kinky people in lovely kinky clothing – and that’s just the crowd, not the fashion show.
I arrived just before 23:00 with K and m – m in short shorts & heels, K in a short skirt and taller heels, me in kilt & combats (commando, of course) – and made our way quickly into the venue to escape the cold. I’d tied a bit of decorative rope onto K for the occasion – first time for her, and it had been a while since I’d done anything decorative like that. It turned out okay, I think :
The place was packed, everyone crowding around the stage for a good view of the fashion show. Excellent clothing, a fantastic skin suspension (and I usually don’t dig those but this was really lovely) and a great “surprise” guest appearance by Midori. She’d mentioned that she was going to be masked, so we were going to have to guess which one was her. Of course, she turned out to be the only one on stage who was masked at all. That made it a bit easier. Not that she’s not easy to pick out of a crowd, regardless. Now, next time, all the mask needs is a hole for a drinking straw…
Upstairs was a little quieter – more dancing space, the VIP lounge (ooooh, fingerfood!) and a play area. One wall of it was windows, so there was quite a crowd outside, looking in. Northbound had brought over an iron suspension frame, and when m and I walked into the play area Morpheous and Dart were already making good use of it. m’s friend Alex had two subs bent over a spanking bench, there was what looked like a mommy/daughter impact scene happening in the corner, a pillory, two St. Andrew’s crosses, a fireplace, some comfy couches, beautiful people lounging in leather… lively.
Not, however, all that inspiring to me.
For whatever reason I didn’t feel like taking out my ropes and doing any tying on m in that space. It might have something to do with the party atmosphere outside. It might have something to do with the sound & proximity of other players in the space. It might have had something to do with my energy that evening on the whole. For whatever reason, all the rope that I’d brought just stayed in my bag and I watched.
There exists a disconnect, it seems, between what sort of energy I want to exchange with partners, and where I want to do it.
I can be tying someone, mid-afternoon, in front of her primary partner, two friends & her sister and suddenly find myself caught in a very very strong shared energetic surge – one that I have to consciously push down and inwards to keep from spilling out into the room.*
I can be alone with someone in my room, kneeling on top of her and have her say to me “Is that all you got?” and have that bring a burst of joy and ferocity to my face and fingers as I lean in on her, and harder, and prove her wrong.*
I can be walking along a city street on a sunny day, simply reach over and put my hand lightly on the back of someone’s neck, feel her body soften and sigh and know how that simple gesture is making her feel, and realize in that moment just how much that little thing feeds me.*
Those moments thrill me in a way playing with someone in a crowded room just, at this point in my life, does not.
The room, however, seemed amazingly engaged. There was a fantastic sense of abandon; people were very much loving the play they were having. It was fun to watch, no question. After a while m and I stepped away & wandered back downstairs, losing ourselves in the crush of the dancefloor for a while. Eventually it got late, and we got tired. Braved the cold again and cabbed back home, where we got out of our party things and collapsed.
Next year? Yes, I think so.
* the three examples, very much from life, and very important to me
