The Control Enthusiast

My good friend & rope compadre Graydancer of The Ropecast and all sorts of GRUEs (including the ToroGRUE and the ToroGRUE 2) has just launched a new content in conjunction with Monk of TwistedMonk.com in response (as I understand it) from a request from a listener of his podcast.
Gray & Monk will be giving away a 50$ (that’s US dollars, to be clear; a bit of a deal for we Canadians) gift certificate each month for the next four months. Each month has a theme, announced on the Ropecast – and ONLY on the Ropecast, so if you’re not listening to the podcast you’d best start – when the winner from the previous month is also announced. As Gray says in the post about the contest, “In other words, if you don’t listen, you won’t know you won. Or how to win the next one.” Click on the sentence for more complete information about the contest.
There will be other prizes given out each month in recognition of particularly creative or laudable work, but really, the fifty bucks is the big deal here. That’s fifty MORE dollars of rope than you had before. And there’s always room for more rope.
I’ve been thinking for a while of talking with Monk about arranging some kind of starter kit for Keyhole Session participants who might be interested in learning a little more about the kind of work I do on our models. Checking out his site, I imagine something like his Value-Line kit would work nicely. If that’s something any Keyhole readers would be interested in, let me know and I’ll start the conversation and see what I can work out.

Tags: GRUE, Rope, ToroGRUE, ToroGRUE 2, keyhole by control
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Me & Dylan, backstage at the Keyhole Sessions.*
There is something about this year, so far. Lots of good stuff coming my way and it doesn’t seem to be letting up anytime soon. And what I’d said before about not letting opportunities pass me by, that’s still very much in effect.
So.
To start, the Keyhole Sessions continue along as wonderfully as they have been. Our new space at The Great Hall is turning out to be everything we thought it would be for us, and more. The different feeling in the room, seeing new faces almost every class, it’s a fantastic thing to be attached to and I’m SO happy I still am. We have lots of good stuff planned for the rest of the season, so keep checking here & the Keyhole website, as well as our Facebook page. We should also be appearing in some more local media over the next month or so, so keep your eyes open for that. Details to come, as they firm up.
This Saturday I’ll be doing a demo of some ropework and talking up the Sessions at an event called “We Are The Trampions”, happening at Lee’s Palace. Featuring a whole lot of Keyhole Models, both onstage and off, the night is a tribute to all things Queen (as in the band). I’ll be tying on the floor somewhere. If you show up, come by and say hello. If you ask nicely, I might tie you up too. If you ask very nicely.
The end of March sees me leaving the country for a short jaunt, and for something I’m amazingly excited about. I’ve been honoured with an invitation to perform at Madison Young’s Art of Restraint, this March 27th. Dylan Ryan – who I tied for the first time for our Valentine’s Day Keyhole Session, and who is pictured above – and I will be performing…something… for the event, along with Monk from TwistedMonk.com and some other fantastic rope performers. The Art of Restraint takes place at Madison’s gallery, Femina Potens, in San Francisco. I am looking forward to being back there; I feel like I only started exploring the city when I was there for the Folsom Street Fair last September. More exploring. More coffee. More chocolate…
Mmmmm, chocolate.
The week after I get back Toronto plays host to the 5th annual Feminist Porn Awards. I donated some rope & time to a couple of fundraisers for the awards and am very much looking forward to attending, both the pre-awards screenings as well as the awards themselves. Lots of amazing people are coming into town for the event and it’s shaping up to be a very sexy couple of days. I’m also plotting a couple of workshops around that time, featuring some out-of-towners, more of which will be revealed as soon as details firm up.
After the FPA’s are done, then all I have to think about is the ToroGRUE 2. May 1st, at Renegade. I don’t need to say too much more about that. Click the link. Come out on May Day and share your brains with us. The more the better.
I’ve also started thinking more, based on conversations and a growing interest, in doing some small-scale teaching. People have come out of the Keyhole Sessions, or approached me while I’m doing a demo, and asked if I teach ropework. Up to now, I’ve been saying no. It took two people asking me in less than a week to realize that maybe, just maybe, I could be sharing the knowledge. So that’s coming together. Feel free to email me by clicking on the Get Control link in the sidebar if you want to talk sessions or prices.
So yes – a lot going on, and none of it I’d ever dream of passing up. It just keeps going and going and frankly I’m not interested in it stopping. Bring on the opportunities.

*Thanks to Nathaniel for the pic.

Tags: Events, GRUE, Life, Performance, Press, Rope, ToroGRUE 2, keyhole by control
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Rumours have been spreading about the possibility of another GRUE happening in Toronto this year. Well, they’re not just rumours, they’re facts. I’m announcing here the dates for the ToroGRUE 2, happening this May 1st at Renegade.

I’m excited to bring Graydancer back to Toronto and to work with the fine folks at Renegade to host an even larger GRUE than last time. The reactions from the participants from 2008’s ToroGRUE at Goodhandy’s were such that as soon as it was over I started thinking of when I could make it happen again. Finding the right venue was the first hurdle, and then making sure schedules would all match up.

Details and a schedule can be found on the ToroGRUE 2 Event Page. I’ll be updating the page as more information firms up. If you’re a member of FetLife (and if you’re not, you really really should be) you can also find out more up-to-date information about the ToroGRUE 2 in the GRUEp.

As before, even though the event has the word “Ropetastic” in the title, the conversation will not be limited to only rope-based topics. Anything kink or BDSM-related can be brought to the event.

Get your brains revved up. You’ve got three months. See you all at the ToroGRUE 2.

Tags: D/s, Events, GRUE, Rope, ToroGRUE 2 by control
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No, not in Toronto – at least, not yet. I am thinking about bringing Graydancer back up here, sometime in the autumn and holding the second annual (?) ToroGRUE. I can only imagine, based on the number of people who wanted to but couldn’t make it out the last time, that we’d have more than enough interest to make it worthwhile. I know there’s things I’d like to cover in a GRUE that I wasn’t able to get into last time (oh, the trials of the organizationally-minded…) and while it would be fun, I won’t be able to make it* to St. Louis at the end of June for the GRUE In The Lou 2.
The GRUE: Graydancer’s Ropetastic Unconference Extravaganza. Gray writes a bit about the history of the GRUE and the upcoming incarnation in St. Louis here, on BestSexBloggers.com. There’s a link at the bottom of that post to an earlier post on “The Care and Feeding of a GRUE”, which gives a very clear idea of what to expect if and when you choose to attend this most unusual of experiences, the kinky unconference.
And you SHOULD attend. Yes, I’m biased, but I still believe the unconference model leaves the participants with more actual takeaway than an strictly programmed and scheduled-to-the-minute traditional conference. At the GRUE, everyone is a listener, a speaker, a teacher and a student. Everyone participates. Everyone has a say in what gets covered; if you don’t see a topic you want to hear more about stuck on that wall at the beginning of the day, you damn well get up, grab a piece of paper & a Sharpie and you stick it up there yourself. It doesn’t take long to realize that, no, you’re not the only person who’s interested in that very thing. And that’s a good feeling.
There’s more information about the GRUE In The Lou 2 on FetLife. If you’re in the St. Louis area, go. Spend the 25 bucks, book the day off and engage.

* I won’t be able to make it because I’m flying to Berlin on that day. A fair tradeoff, I’d say.

Tags: D/s, Events, GRUE, Images, Rights by control
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Last night, I had the chance to introduce someone to rope bondage.  Her reactions to the very simple tie I put on her were a great reminder of why I love rope so much, and how powerful it can be when used correctly. How the very simple things can be used to great effect.

It was, to say the least, eye-opening.

It made me realize that more often than not, for the past while, I’ve been concentrating too much on form and not enough on energy. It’s easy, I think, to get caught up in the mechanics of tying, that it has to look like THIS and use THIS knot and have THIS many wraps. That kind of specificity appeals to my Capricornian brain in a pretty major way – but that doesn’t make it right. It’s way too easy to get caught up in a Lab frame of mind. That’s the part of me that wants to just geek out about what I’m doing – again, the form – and put the WHY I’m doing it aside for the moment. I am realizing I need to change that approach, and try to reconnect with what it is about rope that thrills me.

I’ve also been having lots of conversation recently about taking D/s energy into the public space. The more I talk and think and plan about this, the more I realize I’m getting hungry to flex those muscles again. It’s one thing to give assignments over text, email, voicemail. It’s another to have someone in front of you and be able to reach out and grab them with something as small, as simple, as subtle as a gesture or a soft word. More thoughts on this form of control are sure to follow.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Other bits & thoughts I want to mention, while I’ve got your attention:

Graydancer has released the two latest episodes of the Ropecast, both of which center around the ToroGRUE. The first one is more of an overview of the entire event, with a bunch of recordings taken on the first day Gray and phaedra arrived in Toronto. There’s a tour of Northbound Leather, as well as us chatting on public transit. Yes, you can hear me on there, and it sort of disturbs me at times how much I sound like English is my second language. Strange. The second one is a recording taken during the ToroGRUE of the Fishbowl, a session where one by one the Doms, Subs & Switches sit in the middle of the room to answer questions thrown at them by the other two groups. It’s always interesting, so check it out. Gray has also started offering individual sponsorships on the Ropecast. He’s officially sponsored by TwistedMonk.com, but is opening it up to others. The Ropecast has a lot of listeners, and is still growing, so it’s worth looking into if you’ve got a kink event or product you want to let people know about. And it’s not restricted to rope.

I’m going to be taking a vacation to NYC in late November/early December, and am open to suggestions of things I should do while I’m there. It won’t be my first time in the city, but it will be my first vacation in the city. My time will be pretty much entirely my own. I’m not only looking for kink-related activities, either. Any suggestions are welcome.

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it here before, but a while back I was introduced to the Power in Practice podcast, put together by Soulhuntre, Daddy David, and Flagg. The latest episode addressed a lot of the questions I’ve asked myself in the past, mostly around the way I focus my energy in a dominant but very much non-Alpha way. I recommend starting from the beginning and listening to them all. There hasn’t been an episode yet I haven’t pulled something valuable from. A great resource.

Tags: D/s, Events, GRUE, Rope by control
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